RUN AWAY...BUT NOT TOO FAST.

I am multiple states away from Harrison right now.  Tomorrow it will be eleven days since I've seen him.  By the time I get to him later this week, we will have been apart for two weeks.   If you are lucky, like I am, to have someone in your life who you trust implicitly with your child, then I think time away from them is good for both of you.

I know I will be will a better, more patient, more rested mom when I get back home to my little guy.  I also know that the vacation he is having is made of pure grandparent- fairy dust and summertime joy.  He is staying up late...  Getting his way...  Eating too much sugar.

He's doing all the things you do when mom is away.  I cherish that for him.  He is making memories right now that will be with him for a lifetime.  His lifetime.  His own little personal life.  How is that possible?  How is it that he continues to exist without me?

I think moms can forget that even though their children are born of their astonishing and all consuming love, their children are only "theirs" for a time.  Already, I am seeing glimpses of who Harrison is going to be.  The amazing thing to me, is that I really am just a stepping stone to where he will go.

He is going to need and want me less as he grows.  It has already begun.  That's the whole point of this child rearing thing right?  We make the person.  We house the person.  We try to teach the person to be good and decent.  Then...we let go.

I think it will be the hardest thing I ever do;  that releasing.  I don't know if I'll be very good at it.  I fear I may cling.  I will probably advise where advice is not requested.  I will probably hug too long and call too much.

I will definitely love too hard, if there is such a thing.  But, I am practicing.  I am learning right along with my boy.  He is learning to become a man and I am learning to let it happen.

So for just a couple more days, I am going to stretch myself.  I'm going to focus on who I am when I'm not busy being mom,  and I'm going to let Harrison enjoy a few more days of his mommy independence.  

Then I'm going to get him back and squish him until he can't breathe.  He's still mine for a few more years after all.






How well do you handle time away from your little people?  I want your tips!

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