Monday, February 17, 2014


Girls love attention.  We can act like we are above all that, but there is always something flattering about being wanted.  If two guys are vying for your attention, it's a pretty sweet deal.  If you love them both, it's even better.

I think Derek (my husband) and Harrison have been in competition since the early days.  I can remember sitting down to breastfeed Harrison and he would look at Derek, over the the top of my breast, as if to say "yeah man, that's right.  She's ALL mine now."

Derek, being a mature man, knew that I would not breastfeed forever and refused to accept the challenge in an infant's stare.  I did stop breastfeeding eventually but the battle ensues.  Derek has been worn down by Harrison's possessiveness and now...IT IS ON.

If I give Derek any affection, his little carbon copy shows up promptly to get in on the goods.  "I want a hug!"  "That's my mommy!, he will say.  I have to negotiate my evenings carefully.  "Ok, Harrison, I will lie down with you for a few minutes.  Then I'm going to go into the living room to see daddy."

 "You're going to stay with me first, right, mommy?  It's my turn?"

"Yes, sweety.  It's your turn and then it's daddy's turn."

"And then you'll come right back to me???"

"I'll be back in to check on you in a bit, button."

"How long will you sit with daddy?"

"For a little while, baby."

"But then it'll be my turn for snuggling?"

"Yes, baby."

"Ok, but daddy gets ONE goodnight kiss!  Then I get FIVE kisses."

"Ok, baby."

Whew!  Exhausting, right?  God forbid, Derek acts like he can beat Harrison at something that I give him praise for.  Like when we are reading a story together.  I ask Harrison to sound out the words.  If he takes a minute, Derek will hold up his hand and say "I know! I know!".  Harrison will spin around and hold up his little hand "NO daddy!  I know it!!"

This is pretty much the dynamic of how everything goes between the three of us.  It's very comical and very sweet.

I guess there are worse things in the world than having to balance your attention between two incredible men.  It's a tightrope I'm willing to walk forever.

Do your child and spouse compete for your love?  How do you handle it?  I would love to hear your experiences.

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